some days i feel like a little child, all starry eyed and mystified as to whats happening, and just generally happy and excited to be where i am, no matter what is going on.
Other days i just feel old and grumpy and cynical. Like nothing is going to change, nothing is new, and life is just boring.
Today i feel like the former, and i know its because of the sense of adventure that is coming later this afternoon and evening. Something about how im going to be downtown in Chicago today just makes me feel so good. Im so small and insignificant there, and i blend right in, and that is perfectly ok with me, because i dont like standing out for no reason at all. Its also a nice reminder to feel small every once in a while to help put your problems into perspective. Like yes, i am struggling with some hard things, but things could be worse. i could be friendless and homeless living on the streets dying and freezing alone. how terrible would that be? i can’t even go a day without having some sort of (meaningful) human interaction! i know this isn’t a long post or anything, but i hope whoever reads this would maybe feel how small they really are for a minute, and put their problems and life into perspective. And then remember that yes, we are small and just one of billions of people and problems, BUT G-d (there is always a but) loves you, and not only does He know you exist down here on this spinning ball of dirt, but He knows your name, He knows your thoughts, your worries, your every need and desire, your problems, and the number of hairs on your head. and yes, He made note of the one that just fell from your head to stick to your shirt on the back of your shoulder where you won’t even know its there….the point is, we’re small, but we still matter. and that just inspires me to be more childlike, and just know that everything is somehow going to be taken care of.
